I am sure all of you know by now that Fawn and Zac are leaving California for a FANTASTIC OPPORTUNITY in Greenbay. WAY TO GO!!! However, this does leave some of us in California without our Fawn ;(.
Fawn was kind enough to call and inform me on Saturday that the decision had been made and let me tell you that I did not take the news all that well. I am scared. I will be flat out honest with you. I am TERRIFIED. Fawn and I have seen each other almost everyday through this whole thing and I am not sure that I will be able to do it without her. Will she still be my coach? OF COURSE! We will talk over the phone, e-mail and however else we can do it! But I am scared. I know exactly how I felt when she called and told me and my first inclination (after crying) was to eat...I didn't.
Fawn has been such a rock and mentor and every time I think about her leaving my eyes fill up with tears. I am sad because my best friend is moving, I am scared because now I have to stand on my own two feet and do this by myself, I am scared because I am not sure what standing alone is going to look like, but when the crying is done I realize that God put Fawn in my life to perform what I can only describe to all of you as an absolute miracle. She believed in me when every doctor I had seen had given up hope. She believed in me and taught be how to believe in myself again. Now, God sees it fit to take her someplace else to do the very same thing with other people. No matter where she goes she will bring light and no matter where she goes I will continue to make progress because she has instilled in me the tools I need to be successful. I see myself making healthier decisions just because that is how I eat now, that is what I LIKE now something I would have never done before I met Fawn.
I can do this, I will do this and when I go to visit Fawn and Zac (because oh yes that is happening...get ready for the house guest you two!!) they will get to see that I have continued on this journey not without them, but with their tools and their voices reminding me how to do this. They just need to go and make seismic shifts in other people's lives now.